I am afraid of 3 things in my life: Roller coasters, Lizards and Dentists. If you want a real adventure in your life: Start eating Cakes, only those with a sweet tooth will reach a dentist`s door.
Dentists are noble beings that fix your teeth. That’s what I knew until I visited one. Yes, you can chew, smile and speak right? I want to be a public speaker and one cannot be a good one without teeth. Anyways, one cannot chew without teeth. Anyways, you can`t avoid the dentist especially when you eat cakes.
My first appointment with this devilish creature(not all are bad, just my luck) was 4 years back on the 12th of March. I reached there on time, only to wait for my turn for 40 minutes. Dentists always call you as early as they can as if you have nothing to do in life. When tooth pains and you cannot bite that last piece of cake, you have to hurry. Like a slave, I reached his not so big clinic. I am always in overthinking mode whenever I visit a Stranger. I am definitely in an overthinking mode when I visit a dentist. Anyways, I am always in overthinking mode.
There are different kinds of dentists you will meet if you have a long history of teeth failures. This one was an entertainer. Tall, bald and full of swag. He welcomed me with a devilish smile. I always feel curious when I observe a dentist`s theatre(operation theatre). Swanky equipment and latest gadgets to capture every inch of your teeth. Equipment looks as costly as space vehicles, no wonder devils charge us such an astronomical amount. How else will they recover the investment? He politely asked me to lean onto that fancy chair. Lights on, mouth open, he took few shots by his cool camera. He called it X ray.
Me(timidly): I hope filling will suffice?
I respect dentists, I won’t call him a devil, let us call him Mr.D.
Mr. D(humming some old Hindi songs): No, I guess, you have to undergo root canal treatment, let me take one more X-ray(remember each X-ray is added to his bill).Rather my bill. I mean, the bill he will give me which will cause more pain than this tooth pain.
And people say politicians and Businessmen rob us. Really!!
Dentistry is daylight robbery, my friend. Sometimes, even in the evening, it depends on what time you visit. Your lack of knowledge on the subject and weak tooth leaves you vulnerable at the doors of these robbers.
He went onto explore more teeth that seemingly looked harmless. He blabbered in some fractions.,2/12;3/36….. I knew dentists were crazy but this was unreal. I felt immense pain every time he put those needles(or whatever it was) in an attempt to clean my teeth and then shamelessly claim that almost half of my teeth need filling. Meanwhile, he was asking me to spit every half as a second. I just couldn’t breathe. Now, I don’t even have spit to spit. I was tired of spitting but I still wanted to spit on his lying face.
Then he went back to his casual conversation on how his 10 yr old daughter was demanding a Versace bag. He again started humming Kishore Kumar songs. He left me and my open mouth (with some tools inside my mouth) in the middle and left for attending his phone call. Swag mixed with overconfidence and rudeness
Caller(faint crying voice): I have swelling, medicines don’t work.
Mr. D:Come to the clinic and we will talk
I felt more scared. Should I just run away? Will I be alive after root canal or extraction or whatever he was claiming. Overthinking mode triggered again. Blame the dentist. They are weird, scary and unpredictable.
After 45 minutes of torture, he allowed me to leave.
Day 2: Never be lazy in life. I went to the same devilish dentist because he was nearby and I ate cake again. Just my dumbness.
He welcomed me again with a vicious smile.
Me: I have pain in my last molar(I bragged about my knowledge so he won’t fool me again)
Mr. D(Devilishly): Oh, let me check all the teeth and decide which one to start with
Me: Do this one, It`s urgent
Again, Lights, camera, action, and fancy chair. After intense spitting session and hours of gazing at my teeth. He concluded that it is root canal(more sessions, more money, and his daughter can buy a fancy bag again)
A root canal is like a love affair: unpredictable, complicated, long, painful and you never know when it`s over. But my love affair with this dentist was definitely over. I don’t want to listen to old Hindi songs. I have nothing against Kishore Kumar, but you don’t particularly enjoy his music during moments of excruciating tooth pain. I would have given him a chance if he played heavy metal instead. All you need is something to numb your senses when anesthesia doesn’t work
My next dentist was kind, in fact way too kind. He kept way too many interns. Again, I booked an appointment. Again, I had to wait for an hour. This kind soul welcomed me with an enthusiastic smile. I am always afraid when a dentist smiles at me(past trauma).
Trembling naive hands approached my mouth when this one instructed one of her interns to clean my teeth. I was shaking again. Lights on, camera, mouth open, and action.
So it continued. My Dental Trauma, sweet cravings, and more tooth failures.